Welcome to the Nuthouse

My, my. This local paper just cracks me up. I guess since the Sheriff of Nothing didn’t issue a press release this week on what color to paint the walls, or which deputies are fired without cause and/or tasked with filling vending machines, they have time to publish this august article on bloggers. (H/T Obi’s Sister’s Mom, over the phone)

Blogs are just a technological version of the insane asylum

It’s a rather silly place where people can say just about anything they want to say, but there’s no way to make bloggers say anything important or even sensible.

In other words, it’s the Internet at its best. Pure entertainment and an escape from reality.

[…]While the credibility of blogs as a news source can’t be taken too seriously unless the blog belongs to a credible news source such as CNN, MSNBC, Fox News or a newspaper, the blogs are great entertainment.

In conclusion, blogs should be embraced, but not taken too seriously. They are a nice little escape from the world…

Evidently, Curt Yeomans hasn’t read ALOT of blogs. He obviously hasn’t read Michelle, or any of the MilBlogs (BlackFive, Micheal Yon or Teflon Don, to name a few) or any of the deep thoughts of the Good Doctors, bloggers with halos, bloggers with brains, bloggers in love with art, or any of the numerous “alternative” news outlets or witnessed the outpouring of sympathy or tremendous memorials. He’s also not been exposed to the vile hatred spewed at DailyKos or HuffingtonPost (both of whom I refuse to link). Know how I know? Because of this line – “While the credibility of blogs as a news source can’t be taken too seriously unless the blog belongs to a credible news source such as CNN, MSNBC, Fox News or a newspaper, the blogs are great entertainment.”

Another fluff piece by the fluff paper that can’t even get high school scores right. The paper who could never spell MY name right, the times I managed to make it in.

But obviously more credible than me. Or you.

UPDATE: Teflon Don comments below that this guy is scared for his job. Like all journalists, I assume, since President Bush quoted from Iraq The Model in his 3/28 speech. Those who read (and write) these “silly things” knew immediately whom he had quoted and the impact of his action. And then after the usual lefty backlash, they did not cut and run, but stood up and shouted, “We are Quoted and Proud!”

Let’s follow the paper’s elementary reasoning, a bit, shall we? — Dude, listen up! Since the President quoted a blog, and dude, you know, we hate the President sooo much because he is such an evil and bad man, such a slimebucket, man, then dude, blogs are evil and bad and a total waste of time. Hey dude! I’ve got an idea! We can start a blog at our own paper! Then we could write all the trash we wanted about ol’ stinkin’ W and everyone would believe us because, dude, we’re part of the paper! We could just make stuff up, man! Whoa! Hey dudes! Go wake up So-crates – he could be the blogmaster cuz he’s smart like that.

Yeah, right.

Way to go ITM!

UPDATE II: This explains ALOT. Perhaps this might help.

From the Land of Golden Haze

Work still presses, but had to come up for a quick breather. That is, if the air here was fit to breathe! The pollen count today is 5937 – less that an hundred bazillion little particulates less than the record of 6013 on 4/12/1999. Egads. I love the spring. I hate the pollen.

Several quick hits and then I’m off to code-land again…

Michelle and the HotAir crew have cranked out an outstanding video on “I Am John Doe.” For those living under a rock, the Flying Imams have filed an open-ended lawsuit against the “unnamed” passengers that spoke up against them and had them deplaned. It’s time for this garbarge to stop.

Dr. Sanity points out that even though Time Magazine lauds Ronald Reagan now, they seriously dissed him while was in office. To me, the saddest part of all this, is that the same chant/mindset happens with every administration. Back to Washington. Well, maybe not Washington; he was one of the few. Back to Adams. Even back to King George. Keep going….

The Anchoress relates a story from a teacher friend. Amazing how you can write an essay, filled with hate, but the teacher can only grade it based on the required components used. NOT THE CONTENT. Three guesses as to what the ‘***’ stands for. Yep.

Siggy has more on education. Social promotion always reminds me of my high school graduation night. We were seated in alphabetical order. I felt so special with all my cords and stoles and fancy seals. After we’d gotten our diplomas (back in the day when they really gave you your diploma, not mail it to you later!), the girl sitting next to me asked me to read hers to her. She couldn’t read it. Really. Then I felt very sad.

Fausta, ever the one to plead with folks to use the brain that God gave them, reports on yet another riot by French “youths”. We know what “youths” means. The stupid part of this one is that now, instead of sticking to the original point – the fare-jumper – now the “youths” have politicized the entire issue. Gee, sounds like juvenile projecting (see the Good Doctors) to me. Let’s see:
1. Youngster gets caught.
2. Youngster throws tantrum.
3. Youngster blames nearest sibling/pet/friend/teacher for the bad behavior.

Do Muslims people really think we’re that stupid?

General George Washington wrote on January 14, 1776, “The reflection upon my situation and that of this army produces many an uneasy hour when all around me are wrapped in sleep. Few people know the predicament we are in.”

Indeed.

I Do Nothing for Your Pleasure….

LoD

Roared the Monster. The Lord of Darkness. His evil plan of conquering the Light, so that he might roam the Earth unfettered, was almost complete.

Sound familiar?

Breath of the Beast laments not being able to formulate a name for Islamic terrorism and it’s minions. I say just call a spade a spade – EVIL. Pure EVIL.

It is “Caliphate Islam” that won’t accept a Jewish state in the Middle East because it is considered an affront to the will of Allah that Jews should not only not be subject to Islamic rule but might have Islamic citizens living in a Jewish country. It is Caliphate Islam that so stultifies the lives of its people that they have to emigrate to western countries only to reject the values that make those countries better places to live. Belief in the Caliphate justifies the mass murder of innocent office workers in Manhatten, school children in Beslan and tribal rivals in sub-Saharan Africa. The belief in and desire for the Caliphate is the difference between conservative Islam and the pernicious terrorists that endanger all of mankind for the sake of a utopian nightmare.

He goes on …

A word of caution, Caliphists are sometimes aware that this belief may be a red flag. Often their belief is so strong and insensitive to reality that they acknowledge and talk about it openly. The ones who are most dangerous know enough not to mention this belief in public. In these cases it is important to know how to recognize them by other behavior. At the risk of being accused of behavioral profiling, lets look at a few of the indicators that come to mind:

1. Dehumanizing language- calling non-Muslims names like kuffar (nonbeliever) or referring to them as pigs, monkeys dogs etc…

2. Inability to engage in reasonable discourse without flying into a rage- see my post Don’t Just Stand There, Dhimmi, Humiliate Me about Imam Al Husainy. (below)

3. Refusal to accept the existence of Israel.

4. Extreme Misogyny and gender inequality

5. Blaming all of the incompetence, inefficiency, misfortune, and rage in the Islamic world on: a. The Jews, b. America, c. The West, d. Women, e. Anybody else, f. All of the above

Even actions from ancient Dems long-ago haunt us and our allies. Whether you deal with the demons then or now, their purpose is the same.

…our respect for civilian life is being used against us by an enemy that does not share it.

After watching this, will you finally believe “what” kind of power is behind the liberal Democrats? And that they are determined to dismantle this country; one school, one statute at a time? And they will hand us, our babies, our country, everything we hold close to our heart to this beast called Islam.

Then they will sit around the pool in Hollywood, with their “new pals” and celebrate the liberation of America.

Any questions?

The Week of Strong Ladies

Sorry for the light blogging this week; there’s a big project taking up alot of my bandwidth.

Fausta (who is banned in China by the way – way to go girl!) wrote on Catherine of Aragon, Henry VIII’s first wife. Despite being put away in favor of other wives to follow, she loved Henry until her dying day. Being high-born with powerful relatives is what saved her life. In her last letter to him before her death, she prayed for his soul and declared her unfailing love. As Fausta said,

Confining her to house arrest was the easy way out for him. That she loved Henry enough to forgive him shows who won that match in the end.

Another Cathy, Cathy Seipp passed away yesterday. The outpouring of sympathy and support by bloggers and readers has been incredible. She had a strong voice and a knack for seeing the humor in the posturings of Hollywood; both the dramatic and governmental actors. She will be missed.

Elizabeth Edwards shared her sad news with us today. She’s battled cancer before, but this cancer has resurfaced in her bones. As much as I don’t like her husband’s politics, I wish her the best. At least he obviously cares for her and supports her, unlike other political couples, especially those related to condiments. Update: The Anchoress has an excellent post, echoing my sentiments exactly.

It never occurred to me that the Edwards would be “using” her terrible illness to gain sympathy and support for her husband, and while I am no fan of John Edwards, I still reject that notion and suggest that those who offer it might do well to look inside themselves and see if all they’ve offered up, by making such a charge, is a nasty bit of projection. (End Update)

And speaking of political wives, it’s time for Tipper to step up and lock Al in the basement. After his latest week in DC, he’s jumped the shark so far, he’s in the next state.
1. He violated Senate hearing rules, after being given preferential treatment.
2. He refused to take a “Personal Energy Ethics Pledge” as part of his Senate testimony. Senator John Inhofe (R-OK), the ranking member of the Environmental and Public Works Committee, based the pledge from actual verbiage taken from Al’s Oscar winning PowerPoint presentation. [SNORT!!!]

Come on Tipper, put yourself in the history books, honey. Save the planet.

Sweet Cathy

Cathy Seipp, of Cathy’s World, is slipping away after a long battle with lung cancer. A terrific lady and mom; her time here was too short. And like my friend long-time Benita, may she ever RIP, she’d never smoked a cigarette in her life.

Amy at Advice Goddess has a great tribute to her good friend.

Send some prayers her family’s way via this.

UPDATE: She’s gone (2:05 Left Coast DST). Susan Estrich has a sweet memorial.

Friday Foobars and the Hillary Joke of the Day

Obi obliged this morning with the latest Hillary-Ha-Ha:

Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, and John Edwards were flying to a convention. Barack looked at Hillary, chuckled smugly and said, “You know, I could throw a $1,000 bill out of the window right now and make somebody very happy.”

Hillary shrugged her shoulders and replied, “I could throw ten $100 bills out of the window and make ten people very happy.”

John added, “That being the case, I could throw one hundred $10 bills out of the window and make a hundred people very happy.”

Hearing their exchange, the pilot rolled his eyes and said to his co-pilot, “Such big-shots back there. I could throw all of them out of the window and make 56 million people very happy.”

It’s a long way to November, folks. In the email exchange that followed, I asked Obi if he thought they’d flown commercial or a private “green charter”. He snarked right back with

“It was a green flight with a carbon compensator. The hildabeast would never fly with the great unwashed on a commercial flight.”

Amen to that!

Now on to a few Friday Foobars….

Speaking of “carbon footprints” and “carbon offsets”, you can now buy “Infidelity Offsets.” Really.

It’s the only socially conscious way to properly compensate for your, um, emissions.

Kiwis, not to be outdone by snivelling Muslims, are offended by their on-screen treatment by First Lady Martha Logan in Monday’s episode of “24.”

In part, WACKY [World Alliance for the Cultivation of Kiwis and Yams] stated “The mishandling of kiwi fruit by the show’s producers and writers only serves to foment further kiwi-hatred within America. The show even went so far to implicate a kiwi fruit in the murder of a former U.S. President.

You go, Martha. Yep, you do deserve a medal. Not just for stabbing him, but for putting up with his mind games all those years. Maybe now you can get off the Haldol.

Speaking of Wacky AND Haldol, Siggy gives out awards to the biggest idiots around. My favorite this week is..

The Haldol Honor, awarded each week to the person or persons most out of touch with reality, either on or off medication goes to The ‘Personality Hotels’ chain (’Small Hotels. BIG Personalities!’)

A San Francisco hotel chain has taken a bold leap into previously uncharted realms of celebrity gawking and good taste, by offering its patrons the ‘Britney Breakdown Package’, in which they can lovingly recreate Ms. Spears’ downward spiral into oddness.

A $50 voucher for a trip to a hair salon is thrown in, just in case you should feel a burning need to get rid of all your hair because the bad goblins who whisper at you are hiding in it.

And you’ll also get a Marc Jacobs hand mirror – either for reminding yourself just how fabulous you look, or for staring into endlessly, weeping silently at the hollow, soulless death-mask that stares back at you.

The fun doesn’t end there. Britney-a-likes taking advantage of the package will also get a bottle of luxury water, insofar as water can actually be luxurious, for those rare moments when alcohol seems like it might not be the best idea. And, most importantly, guests will get given a pair of knickers, so that they remember to wear knickers.

Yeah, there are legions of people who want to be in Britney’s psycho boots.

You betcha. While the Super Fantistic Manolo always has good advice about boots, psycho or not, he wonders about these

And this is certainly something that would scare you halfway into next week. Mrs. Doubtfire, he AIN’T.

Instead of “The Three Little Puppies”, how about “The Three Little Puppets“? Morons.

And last, but not least, not at all, dearest, oh pukkie pooh, Almost Sir Beck & Posh’s move to LA will be now documented breath by breath. Dear Lord, I can hardly wait.

NOT.

UPDATE: Not a retard. But plays one on TV.

On Pi Day and Clinton Lie Detectors

Who’d of thunk it?

My blog-i-birthday is Pi Day! I think that is especially humorous, since I work at a geeky university that even has a Pi Mile mapped out on campus. For those mathematically challenged runners, I suppose, that can’t calculate it in their heads.

In honor of Pi Day, I present my favorite song from the movie Michael.

Pie, Pie
Me oh my
Nothing tastes sweet, wet, salty and dry
all at once o well it’s pie
Apple!
Pumpkin!
Minced
an’ wet bottom.
Come to your place everyday if you’ve got em’
Pie
Me o my
I love pie.

Now we all remember Bill Clinton’s Lie Detector, right? That waggin’ finger.

Every time Bill Clinton leans forward and points his finger, he lies.

Now Hillary has tipped her hand. Seems the last time she uttered “Vast, Right-Wing Conspiracy“, she was lying, too. We all know who was telling the truth then.

The blog-i-birthday celebrations continue…. 😉


UPDATE:
Jeremayakovka has a great post on Hillary’s latest utterance, calling it “a partisan broadside.”

Has it been A Year already?

One year ago today, the blog “Obi’s Sister” was created.

It was named in honor of my little brother, the great Obi-Wan Ben Kenobi: Master Jedi, Champion Blue Devils Snare Drummer, Bulldawg to the Bone, PGA Golfer, Footballer, Marathon Runner, Consumer of Mass Quantities of “Do-Do” balls, great brother, friend, husband and father. During many nights in his yard/ driveway/kitchen, the discussions we had brought me out of my middle-age induced fog to realization that we Americans needed to take back America.

As I said that first day,

9/11 was my wake-up call. It was almost like those time travel sequences you see in the movies – BAM – you’re there. Disoriented. Lost. Confused. But I was never afraid. Just really pissed off that the blissful daze of my middle years had been forcibly taken from me. Since then, I have watched with incredulous disbelief the way most of our elected officials behave, how other countries smile and shake our hands while they stab us in the back and how the media has gone from the less than trustworthy uncle to the downright lying scoundrel and/or pedophile you cross the street to avoid. Its time to speak out.

Things I’ve learned this past year:

• I’m not as technical as I thought I was.
• I really enjoy writing (as much as I DID NOT enjoy it during my school years).
• The research capabilities of the Internet are boundless. Think of all the time you’d have to spend in the library, surrounded by books, rooting out all this stuff.
• I miss the library.
• For the most part, the state of our public press is appalling.
• For the most part, the state or our education systems, including colleges, is appalling.
• For the most part, the manner in which our elected officials comport themselves is appalling.
• There are many, many people just like me, ordinary people, with kids and mortgages and jobs and aging parents, that are as equally aghast as I at what our country and our world has become.
• If you say it, people will listen.
• You can make great friends without meeting them face to face. Folks who send you funny emails. Good Samaritans. People with great insight. And there are those who will drop and pray for you and yours, simply because you ask.

Hang on, this next year should be a wild ride!

That Terribly Fragile Iranian Ego

Now why is this a surprise?

An Iranian official on Sunday lashed out at the Hollywood movie “300” for insulting the Persian civilization, local Fars News Agency reported.

Hmm…Cartoons…Muslims…Obessive Compulsive Disorder…Paranoia. So a movie about an actual historical event from 2500 years ago insults Muslim sensibilities in today’s world. I guess they don’t cover that battle in Muslim textbooks. That was removed to make more room for such stellar science as the World is Flat and Jews are Monkeys.

Well, There You Go…

A while back, via Jeremayakovka, I found a website called Breath of the Beast. He had his MuslimsHateUsAll epithany when his little daughter was threatened by a PLAYMATE who’d just returned from a family trip to Grandma’s in the Middle East. The neighbor’s kid. Yep. Really. Pull up a chair and read a while. In The Terriorization of the Defenseless he briefly outlines the collapse of basic human dignity that accompanies the Muslim way of life:

If the relatively small shock that affected my family has no effect on you and the plight of Millions of Muslim women does not do it either, I have to bring up the most dire of all the indictments against Muslim culture and the Arab fundamentalists in particular.

Above and beyond recruiting them as suicide bombers, rock throwers and human shields, dwarfing the dreadful cult of blood and hate they teach them from kindergarten on. There is the pandemic of violence toward and sexual abuse of children in the Islamic World. The Islamic child abuse problem is the most immense and covert tragedy in the modern world. Children are the most abjectly powerless members of any society, so they are also the best test of the inherent goodness or evil of that society. Their cries of pain and despair are easily kept from the outside world so they are at the mercy of those whose responsibility it is to care for them. When they are used for political and ideological purposes it is bad enough- these are expressed publicly so there is at least some moderation by the standards of the larger society (such as they might be). But with physical and sexual abuse there is often an absolute protection for the abuser. The abuse takes place in the confines of the home- the very place that should be the child’s ultimate shelter.

The tragedy of it is that along with the moral and cultural relativism that we in the liberal west often use to excuse and conceal the horror of:

•the continuing human slave trade
•the destruction of Darfour
•the honor killing of women
•the social repression of women
•the intolerance of infidel and non believers, and
•the inability to engage in the most rudimentary standards of modern discourse

…we also entertain the naïve and mistaken belief (more of a hope) that all people are endowed with the same sense of what is right and wrong. This is one of our most dangerous delusions.

I wonder how many women and children will die in Iran today, because some wahoo is “insulted” by a movie?

Steak Tartare and Femme Fatales

Well, here we go again. Fausta wrote on Friday on International Women’s Day (ooopppss, missed the notice on that one!) about a Dolce & Gabbana ad that has EU feminists up in arms. Go read the entire article and comments.

First off, I wasn’t really sure what it was advertising….Hawaiian Tropic? Air Conditioning units for the double-wide? Ab-crunchers? A new barber in town, perhaps? Hmmmm…..Then I went off to Athens for the weekend and pondered the picture along with some of the posts I’d read about it.

From the very beginning, advertising has always used sex to sell. For some reason, marketeers have always thought that consumers will buy something simply because it’s marketed as sexy. Never mind – How much does it cost? Does it taste good? Will it last? Does it make my butt look big? Back when I was younger, though, it was much more subtle. Almost like an art. Nowadays, they just plop the goods on the slab and invite the ogles. Girls Gone Wild, but for pork-n-beans.
Where’s the mystery? Remember the Abercrombie & Fitch stink from “outraged” parents a few years back about the “soft-p_rn” in their catalogs? Same song, different verse. Just a higher-end audience.

(Aside: I saw a magazine ad a few months ago with D&G again, but this time for a RAZR phone. They were in some kind of casual embrace, and one had what looked like a cut on his face and the other was holding the RAZR like he’d done the cutting. Now that’s romance for you….I guess).

As Fausta said …

…the thought police are calling for more government intervention to protect us from ourselves.

[…] The ad has caused a huge controversy in Spain, France2 was scandalized into reporting on it, and now Amnesty International in Italy is asking that the ad be pulled from Italian magazines.

Think about that for a moment: millions of men, women, and children are opressed around the world, abused, enslaved, and executed, and AI/I finds time to protest an ad in a fashion magazine.

So let me get this straight, Euopeans turn a blind eye to the violent abuse suffered by women all over their continent, but they get all frothy over an ad?

Pamela at Atlas Shrugs thinks this is a metaphor. Sorta.

Fausta goes further today in her post about Palestinian honor killings, tying together many strings. (Update: Siggy has one word for it…”Stupidfying.”)

The Muslim Women’s League outlines a position on honor killings:

The problem of “honor killings” is not a problem of morality or of ensuring that women maintain their own personal virtue; rather, it is a problem of domination, power and hatred of women who, in these instances, are viewed as nothing more than servants to the family, both physically and symbolically.

According our favorite cleric, women (unveiled) are uncovered meat and are basically asking for it. Fausta had alot to say about that, too.

Because, without a doubt, the immorality of believing that women do not have a right to their own genitalia, a right to have that that they are born with, by God’s grace; the immorality of thinking that a father has the duty to inflict such harm on his own daughter; the immorality of believing that women are “uncovered meat”; and the immorality of sermonizing that not wearing a veil, “swaying when they walk”, and wearing make-up deserves rape, is, or at least ought to be, clear beyond any question.

And don’t forget to beat up little girls for stepping on prayer rugs. The lunacy goes on and on.

Nihad-Afroun-and-her-mother.jpg

Notice how this circle continues to double back on itself? The Islamic nutjobs, the PC nutjobs, the liberal feminist nutjobs…it looks like they are all cut out the same piece of cloth.

Most reasonable adults understand that life is full of choices. And most of those self-same adults understand that if you don’t want to see it, you don’t have to look at it or buy it. It’s called self-control. Furthermore, this kind of peep-show was going on long before the Romans were organizing the neighborhood orgies.

But the key word in that last paragraph ADULTS. It seems that today reactions to stuff like this is soooo different. It’s Pavlovian. Anything, anywhere, anytime – that might possibly offend anyone – has to be dragged out and paraded about for the maximum amount of one-ups-manship. “What you said to me is more offensive to me than what you said to him so I’m going to do something even more offensive to you…..”. NAAAAHHH! This is not mature behaviour or reasoning. It’s the programmed, conditioned response by people programmed and conditioned by government and the media to see everyone, including themselves and their pets and their neighbor’s steaks on the grill, as victims.

Everyone is a victim. Everyone has an agenda. Everybody cries Wolf.

And Nero fiddles while Rome burns.

Related: See Dr. Sanity for a fine definition of displacement…..that’s what this is aaaawwwwlllll about.

UPDATE: Here’s how International Women’s Day was celebrated in Iran.

Riot police swarmed over a few dozen women who bravely gathered near the parliament in an attempt to hold a peaceful demonstration. Some were beaten; some were arrested and taken away in vans. All mention of the demonstration was purged from state-controlled media, and independent papers and blogs were warned not to cover it, according to the Los Angeles Times.

Trees Blooming in my Nose – All for the Good of the Planet

AhhhhhChooo! I just love Spring in the South! The trees, the flowers, the grass; all beautiful to behold. They are all greening up, budding out and crawling straight up my nose. Maaah-Veh-Laahs.

Is the assault on my sinuses by Gaia and her blooming minions an action protected by the tree-hugging nutjobs? Is Al Gore gonna stick a camera up my nose? Am I offending Mother Earth by pouring my springtime cocktail of antihistamines & acetaminophin chased with caffeine down my gullet? Other people get to sit on their porch with adult beverages of choice, maybe with a cute little umbrella, marveling at the beauty of their roses. Me, I hide under the bed until June. Sometimes July.

Michelle learns to talk like a good Southern girl… Y’aaaaaall didn’t draw the diphthongs out nearly long enough. By the way, I did see the video of Hillary earlier and didn’t really think it was even close to a Southern accent. It sounded more like a semi-Midwesterner doing a bad imitation of girlz in the hood. With NO rhythm…but that’s just me…

Here’s another video – this one compliments of Fausta – who shares my unrequited yearnings for a certain bald Shakespearean who looked downright smashing in a skin tight uniform. And we just won’t mention the time that Siggy tried to convince us that he was Patrick’s twin. Or something like that….. 😉

Speaking of greening, ahem, the globalwarmingistas are poking around in your bedroom.

Other ways of “greenwashing” the bedroom, as outlined by TreeHugger and Greenpeace, include turning out the lights, not buying PVC or vinyl accoutrements, ensuring S&M paddles are made from sustainably harvested timber, using organic massage oils, showering together, using bamboo bed sheets (they come from a rapidly renewable resource and are said to be “super sexy”), and wearing lingerie made with renewable fibres such as hemp (Enamore), bamboo (Butta) and other organic goodness (GreenKnickers, Buenostyle, Peau Ethique).

Gordon notes there’s even an eco-friendly adult website dedicated to naked vegetarians, appropriately called Veg P_rn.

(Note: Fausta used this notation “p_rn” to avoid the other word, and therefore avoiding showing up in those kind of searches!)

This sounds like soooooo, soooooo….well, icky. And why use S&M paddles when a nine-iron is just dandy?!? Obviously, folks have been engaged in this “activity” since the Earth was created. That’s how we all got here – Adam, Eve, the entire cast of Ben Hur. The Stone/Bronze/Iron Age folks were all procreating happily away, oblivious to the label they would be hung with millenniums later. Ooooopppps, did I just offend the over-sensitive Geiko Caveman? Or worse, some tribe I’ve never even met? (By the way, PJM files this one under Oh Just Shut UP!)

“All anthropologists would agree that the negative use of the terms ‘primitive’ and ‘stone age’ to describe [tribal peoples] has serious implications for their welfare,” says a statement from the anthropologists’ professional association.

As Captain Cavemen commented on PJM:

What a hoot. It is sad when tv commercials parody kneejerk wingnut behavior…before it happens!

[Snort!] Honestly, folks, I don’t make this stuff up. Clairvoyant…I tell ya! Ooops I might have offended a psychically-enhanced person with that remark… Awwww, who cares!

UPDATE: I forgot about this hilarious bit of silliness back in the fall, as the Anchoress decried “the moral arbiters of our time [that] have decided that keeping your private life private is not mere personal discretion” and then promptly outed herself as a married worman who enjoys sex. Personally, I think those bamboo sheets might give you splinters. As Siggy said …

“Much as so many people would like to believe the world revolves around their crotch, it just isn’t so.”

Honestly, I think the world revolves around cow farts. In fact, I think the cow farts have become such a force of nature that it’s now what powers our planet’s spin in its orbit around the Sun. You know, the Sun that’s making us warmer, but you can’t believe that if you’re not a scientist, can you?

Tell me something I DON’T know

A study was released a few days ago outlining how today’s college students are more narcissistic than their predecessors. Well DUUUUUH. Anyone who is a parent of one of these creatures knows full well the wrath one faces when you say words like “responsibility” or “respect” or “morality” or heaven forbid, the granddaddy bad-word of them all: “BUDGET.”

It starts in grade school. What’s yours is mine and what’s mine is mine and we’re all the most special little people in the world. Mamacita uses school supplies to teach a lesson in responsibility:

This business of everything being community property in the classroom causes problems in the upper levels, too. Junior high, high school, even college students, are expecting things to be available for them without any effort on their part. Upper level students come to class without pencils, erasers, etc, because they’re used to having those things always available in some community bin somewhere in the room. They have never been required, or allowed, to maintain their own things, and now they don’t know how to. The stuff was always just THERE, for a student to help himself to. And now that they are supposed to maintain their own, they really don’t know how. Plus, why should they? HEY, I need a pencil, Teach, gimme one.

Well, it worked down in the lower grades, with community property. You just get up and help yourself; everything in this room is for me, ain’t it? Gimme that pretty one, I want it.

Just look at this list of “character traits” of a typical college-aged narcissist. Numbers 17 and 18 are especially enlightening. There’s an old saying; “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.” Years ago, when I was in college (you know when the Model T was new and women couldn’t vote but had to wear corsets), I went off on a long weekend with a large group of friends. We stayed at a parent’s (not mine) very nice lake house. I got up for breakfast on Sunday, and the host (the son) had on the most interesting apron. It was red, stained with flour and imprinted with “You can lead a whore to culture, but you can’t make her think.” For years, I’ve mulled over that saying. At different stages of my like, it took on different meanings. While it’s witty and a play on words, it’s also very, very true. Today’s students, like the celebrities they worship and politicians as well, are like the whores. Most have no sense of propriety or morality – it’s all about ME ME ME and what’s in it for ME. In their middle and high school years, grades were handed to them simply for showing up and not packing heat. Teachers weren’t respected and admired; merely reviled and tolerated. Parents gave them cars and clothes and cell phones and credit cards. Parents stopped being parents and tried to be pals; only to be cast aside like last week’s BFF when the credit limit was reached. No wonder so many colleges are out of control. College stopped being the place you went to expand your mind and grow up in a relatively protected environment to a perpetual Mardi Gras. The lines of authority and accountability are blurred to such a point, that no one knows who’s minding the zoo.

Is it any wonder that the product of such fine institutions of “high”-er learning are producing graduates who can barely communicate, but expect their first job out of the chute to be able to support a lifestyle complete with a BMW and a downtown loft. Either that, or they retreat into the Failure to Launch pattern. Regardless, they have such over-inflated opinions of themselves that they resemble…yes… yes.. POLITICIANS? I could link ad nauseum, to politicians who legislate morality for everyone but themselves, who continually “mis-speak” (LIE for those not versed in the current PC-ese), who rewrite history based on the latest fashionable political view, who publish books filled with mistruths, who use money and power for their own corrupt agendas and on and on and on… Political narcissism has been elevated to an art form.

But wait, it gets even better. The Grand PooBah of them all, is channeling Pinky. Really! He honestly believes he can take over the world. Yes, gentle reader, hold on to your shorts. Al Gore, the self-proclaimed Savior of the World, Inventor of the Internet and Supreme WeatherMaker, wins the prize for the World’s Greatest Narcissist. What a fabulous award! And it’s just perfect! The chilling part is he’s been planning this for a very long time. The global-warming facade is just his cover for what he’s really up to. RiehlWorldView and Mark Stein lay out the entire Orwellian game plan. It’s all about the MONEY. You control the MONEY, you control the world, the press, the governments, everything. Kinda like the Sheriff of Nottingham, but with bad hair and an enormous, inflated ego.

Which brings us full circle, at least for today. Just read the shrinks (Siggy, Dr Sanity, Shrinkwrapped, Neo) for an in-depth analysis. Just have a seat on the couch. And amid the voices in your head, all screaming ME ME ME ME, learn to say one word to the demons within and without.

NO.

MomSoUnCool

The Age of Ann

Fausta has an excellent post up today: an open letter to the CPAC organizers regarding the consequences of Ann Coulter’s runaway mouth. What was she thinking?!?!?

Ann Coulter used to serve the movement well. She was telegenic, intelligent, and witty. She was also fearless: saying provocative things to inspire deeper thought and cutting through the haze of competing information has its uses. But Coulter’s fearlessness has become an addiction to shock value. She draws attention to herself, rather than placing the spotlight on conservative ideas.

That sounds like something that would come out of my college-aged daugther’s mouth. “Gee, let’s see what I can say today that will really piss off Mom & Dad…” Ann, you know better. You have the education, you have the brains, you have the forum….use it. Use them all.

Coulter’s vicious word choice tells the world she care[s] little about the feelings of a large group that often feels marginalized and despised. Her word choice forces conservatives to waste time defending themselves against charges of homophobia rather than advancing conservative ideas.

Why do others have to clean up your messes? You’ve done this before, with an equally offense remark at the same conference in 2006. Why do you insist that other conservatives step into the role of “Helicopter Parents” to fix what you’ve broken? Or screwed up? I thought you had a greater mental capacity than an almost-20-year-old.

One of the points of CPAC is the opportunity it gives college students to meet other young conservatives and learn from our leaders. Unlike on their campuses – where they often feel alone – at CPAC they know they are part of a vibrant political movement. What example is set when one highlight of the conference is finding out what shocking phrase will emerge from Ann Coulter’s mouth? How can we teach young conservatives to fight for their principles with civility and respect when Ann Coulter is allowed to address the conference? Coulter’s invective is a sign of weak thinking and unprincipled politicking.

Ann, Ann, if you can’t contribute to the fight for all that is good and right about America and the freedoms she was founded on, then sit down and shut up. Or go sign up to be a backup singer for the Dixie Chicks.

The Age of Ann has passed.

Off to See the Goracle

Having some enforced time off from blogging puts the day’s/week’s politics and “news” in a completely different light. You hear the crap on the radio/TV, see the headlines on newspapers as you walk by the paper machines or scattered on the tables at Starbuck’s. After almost a year’s worth of blogging, you develop a healthy skepticism for anything that comes out of the media. Period. You realize everything, EVERYTHING is agendacized, down to the books displayed in the windows of the booksellers. But you feel better, confident, even empowered, to know that you KNOW that’s it’s all a lie. Nothing but smoke and mirrors.

While the conflict in the Middle East parallels other events we are very, very aware of, and world powers that could really do something about it can’t find their way out of a paper bag, the global/warming/cooling/changing crowd is getting an inordinate amount of press. And being snarky and blog-starved, I just can’t help myself. This is just soooo hilarious.

Al Gore’s camp glows like the SNL Nuclear Family Skit in its “carbon-neutrality.” IowaHawk has an interesting angle on the carbon-offset strategy and some really cool bumper sticker ideas. I mean, after all, it’s all about the money, right?

So here are my questions:

If Al Gore farts in the general direction of the cow that farted in his general direction, is that considered a “carbon-offset”? I mean, after all, the methane streams were aimed at each other and should deflect off each other, thus dissipating in the atmosphere. Correct?

Or… if Al Gore farted in his limo, but since the privacy screen was up and therefore no one heard him rip one, does he still have to buy a block of green energy?

Or… if Al Gore wins his war against common-sense thinking and is able to cow the media to report only the news he believes fit to print, will the 17,000 plus scientists using actual scientific methods to view the non-evidence (yikes! imagine that!) start their own country where the cows are free to roam without fear of some Gas-Bag-Ex-Politico plugging up their backsides to save the planet?

Or… if the Goracle at the end of the Yellow Brick Road turns out to really be Jabba the Hut in drag, will the King of Globaloney melt like Elphaba if a litte water (non-polluted, by the way) is tossed his way?

Surely, these are the questions that trouble The Force today.

NOT.

UPDATE: Sometimes Gerard makes me spit out my tea. Laughing hysterically.

Hillary Joke of the Day

The class in the middle of traffic HELL ends tomorrow…..then maybe I get my life back!

Here’s the Hillary Joke of the Day, compliments of Obi:

Hillary Clinton died and went to heaven. As she stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, she saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

She asked, “What are all those clocks?”

St. Peter answered, “Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move.”

“Oh,” said Hillary, “Whose clock is that?”

“That’s Mother Teresa’s. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.”

“Incredible,” said Hillary. “And whose clock is that one?” St. Peter responded, That’s Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands have only moved twice indicating he only lied two times in his life.”

“Where’s Bill’s clock?” asked Hillary.

“Bill’s clock is in Jesus’ office. He’s using it as a ceiling fan.”

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